Discover my world as I live it.

Sometimes i think that I have given up on trying to live...like how i withdraw because I'm scared. I feel guilty...like I've neglected some of my friends and when I see pictures of them enjoying theirselves without me I get sad. But it can't be help right? People drift apart when circumstances that brought them together in the first place changes. But it's my fault too because I don't make the effort but when I made a decision to quit choir I know that I'd be alienating myself from that group of friends. I don't even know if there'll be a x'mas party this year. It may be true that if i call people, they will come but do they want to? I really dun know. Every year it's the same thing. I would like to meet up with the same people but I want a change because I know that some are quite bored with what we do every year. I really don't know what to think. Feeling quite low.

U probably can tell because I'm not even writing or thinking coherently....and that i'm prob just posting for the sake of posting
whatever